Curiosity

"I won't give up, I can't give in. Can't get enough, where to begin?"

As each day passes by I find myself more alone then ever. Some days I'll start to feel like I've finally been accepted, wanted, but the feeling consistently fades away by nightfall. These feelings make me wonder if I'm okay, if I'm even "normal". I just want these feelings to escape my heart and my mind. They put me at such a low I can't even feel anything.

I know now more then ever that I need to get away. The people that I've been surrounding myself with are not good for me. There are too many memories and judgements. I'm sick of not being able to go somewhere because somebody else is there that doesn't like me or isn't allowed to like me. It's pathetic middle school shit and I'm done pretending it's going to get better. It's never going to get better. These people should not be the ones I rely on.

Lately I can only trust a few people. Only a selected few have been there for me. I can probably say that I have only one friend. She's been the only one there for me and I talk to her everyday. I don't know who else I would hangout with if it wasn't for her. So onto a deeper feeling, curiosity. What has God in store for me now?